Friday, November 11, 2011


It's 11/11/11 and a great many people are really counting on their wishes coming true today. They even closed the Great Pyramid in Egypt because there were reports of groups wanting to hold ceremonies inside. They were said to be trying to glean some of the magical powers from the pyramid on this special day.

Now, I'm a fan of conspiracy theory as much as the next person that also believes in Nessie (She's real y'all. She's in the Loch Ness and she's real. She is.), and you know how much I love ancient Egyptian folklore and culture, but I have some real questions about this. What's the significance of the magical power of today and the pyramid? I guess it's the fact that all the numbers are exactly the same and that won't happen again for another hundred years. But the Egyptian officials said that at 11:11 on 11/11/11, nothing was out of the ordinary. Except they had closed the pyramid.

This can only mean that these groups that wanted in there were onto something. Am I right? I mean, why else would they close the pyramid down if not to hoard all the magic for themselves? I don't think I'm alone in thinking that Egypt could use some magic after the year they've had, and perhaps this was a selfish move on the government there to keep the magic to themselves.

That makes me wonder what the magic did exactly. When the clock hit 11:11 and the magic of the pyramid was secretly released to the selfish government officials who snuck in there, what did they get out of it? Did they see visions of King Tut being super-pissed from beyond the grave that he became so famous when in reality all he ever wanted was to be a normal boy? (he and Frodo Baggins have this in common) Maybe they saw a vision of Cleopatra in which they realized she wasn't actually beautiful and she actually looked more like Star Jones before the bypass surgery. It would stand to reason that if they saw that, they also saw in an adjacent vision that Mark Antony looks eerily similar to Marc Anthony, a realization that was at once both frightening and disappointing.

Ultimately, I don't think we'll ever know what happened inside the Great Pyramid at 11:11 on 11/11/11, but I'd like to believe that something amazing happened. People all over the world today are making wishes, for what purpose I'm still not one hundred percent clear on, but I'd like to believe that with all that positivity being thrust into existence, something great might happen. And I know we aren't supposed to tell people what our wish is (or is that just when you throw money into the fountain at a mall?) so I will just tell you that my 11/11/11 wish may or may not have something to do with a magazine...or a person...or a monster in Scotland.

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